Archive for the ‘ weight loss ’ Category

Enough wallowing, get going, self!

Wow, this blog has been all gloom and whining recently. so I’m going to focus on the positive.

  • My ankle is still sore, but going to the gym and hopping on the exercise bike has finally had the effect the physio said it would. It’s flushed the area out, and while I have a lump at the back of the ankle where calcaneofibral tore, my entire ankle/calf is no longer twice the size of the other! I can see my ankle bone again!
  • For the longest time, I’ve had problems with consuming a healthy level of alcohol. I have difficulty stopping at one or two drinks–you know, the bottle’s there, it’s open, I live alone, etc. Last night I had a beer. One beer. and even though I have a sixpack, I didn’t want to drink any more. I’m hopeful that I can set up a healthy pattern that fits in with my goals and still enjoy myself. I’m aiming to make this six-pack last three weeks.
  • I know I try not to take too much notice of the daily weight, but today was a good day. I’m 0.2 of a pound from my lowest recorded weight, the trend is headed downwards.
  • I am actually slightly over 25% of the way towards my goal weight.
  • I am 100g away from losing 9kg since the start of the year, and 0.5 of a pound away from losing 20 pounds (I like round numbers).
  • Achievements!
  • Over the last week, I have packed my lunch for the next day every night.
  • I have started making my bed again. UfYH would be proud of me! Also, I’ve made my lunch for the next day every night this week, and set out my breakfast so I’ve eaten breakfast at home every morning this week except Monday, when I was still getting organised.
  • I’ve exercised every night for the past 4 days.

I’m starting this weekend with a positive attitude!


Settling in

I know that this is going to be a long journey. It’s very hard not to get impatient, though. I am seeing results, but slower than I’d like.

Still, I know that part of the reason that it’s best for it to take a long time is that I’m aiming for a long-term habit change. The way I was eating before was neither healthy nor sustainable. So now I’ve shifted to an eating pattern that is more sustainable, and by tracking it every day, I’m going to develop habits that will maintain my body and health. If I just can continue this, then the adjustment I have to make when I go onto maintaining my weight will be less.

I’m trying to get into the habit of going to bed earlier and waking up earlier. The waking up isn’t going so well, but I do feel better now I’m getting more sleep.

I’ve been doing yoga. I’ve found a site called “Do Yoga With Me.” It’s a fantastic resource. I can’t always make myself get out and go for a walk, but I can walk into the spare room and turn on my laptop. (I’d like to do yoga classes too, but finances and time do not allow that at the moment. Also, if I’m failing on getting to the gym, which is a 10 minute drive away, how’m I going to go on going to a yoga studio half an hour away?)

I’m going to do a whole heap of different classes, but I’m hoping to do a class that focusses on a different body part each day of the week. In addition to that, I’m going to start doing yoga pre and post my runs, to stretch out a little. I’m already finding it beneficial. I’ve had sciatica (not badly, but just a nagging pain) for the last couple of days. Last night I did an hour long class focussing on twists and stretches. I’m in no pain this morning.

Running is going fantastically. I managed to run the entire 15 minutes of the free-form run both of the last two sessions, and in the last session I felt like I could have gone faster.

The scale is bouncing up and down and I’m trying not to worry so long as the trend is down (it is). I’m also trying to be a bit more observant of what my body wants, within limits. Yesterday I ended up going for an extra walk because I wanted to eat ALL THE THINGS to balance my calories. Today, I’m going for a run, and I should be eating more, but I’m actually not hungry. I’m still eating–meals and at least one of my snacks every couple of hours is non-negotiable, but I don’t eat the second piece of fruit/yoghurt that I have room for in my calories if I’m not hungry.

Off the plateau

I’m finally off the plateau. My “trend line” in the Hacker’s diet was always going down, but it was so frustrating to see the scales not move. I couldn’t seem to break that 190.9 pound barrier–it wasn’t even that I dipped below and then would hover around it, I would just never measure below that number.

Yesterday was a bad day. I forgot to bring my yoghurt to work and couldn’t get out to buy one. I did have an apple as a snack in the afternoon, but it just doesn’t fill me up. I had fish planned that evening for dinner and I refuse to buy fish on anything other than the day I’m cooking/eating it, so I went to the shops while I was hungry.


Some chocolate and liquorice purchases later, I snacked on them was I was eating dinner.

But the thing is:

That’s not the end of the world. I don’t want to do it every day. But I did weigh my portions and log them. I cut out one of the veges (I was going to have fish, four veges and quinoa, and I ended up just having fish and three veges.)

Then I worked out that if I walked for an hour, my calories would balance for the day. I REALLY didn’t want to. It was cold and wet. But I put on a long-sleeved top and just went.

And then I thought “… if I do week 3 session 3 of Zombies Run 5k training, that will work out pretty much the same calorie-wise, AND it only takes 42 minutes.” So I ran.

My god it was hard work. The easy runs of Tuesday were a thing of the past. But I perservered and kept at it. Did all of the walk/run drills, ran the first five minutes. Didn’t manage to make half of one of the 8 minute freeform runs (it’s just a minimum I’ve set for myself) but did manage the other. At the end of the day, my calories balanced.

Also as a note to self–I dressed in a long-sleeved top, because I thought I was going to be walking. I should have dressed in a short-sleeved top as running just makes me too hot. Lesson learned.

And this morning the scales showed 190.

So: failing isn’t the end of the world, if you can control it, try to mitigate the damage and continuing to work will see you mostly ok.

Feeling my way

So, I honestly don’t feel hungry much. Or rather, I feel… english doesn’t have the words.

I feel hungry. What may be low blood sugar. But I can feel that while simultaneously feeling like my stomach is full–like around now (when I’m writing this), two hours after lunch. I had a huge salad with poached chicken breast. I feel physically full, but like I want to eat. It’s odd.

(note: as I type this, I had a soy yoghurt. The effect was immediate, too fast for blood sugar. So, that’s a psychological effect then. Interesting.)

Anyway, I’ve been reading and reading. Every thing I read does suggest that I should be eating more than I am. The thing is, I am eating more now (in terms of volume) than I have for a long time. The fact that I’m no longer eating cheese or bread, both of which are relatively dense in terms of calories to volume, probably accounts for it. (I say no longer, I mean, lunch is a huge amount of salad and a serve of chicken rather than lunch being a large roll with brie, beef and roquette. Volume-wise, they’re about the same. Fibre-wise and calorie-wise–not even close. )

I do have noticeably more energy. Every calculator (and for the record, this one seems really accurate) that I put my weight, age and height into as well as my basic level of activity tells me that my BMR is around 1,585 calories.

Maybe I should eat more and see if I lose weight? I don’t know.

I guess it’s a holding pattern until Saturday, when I talk to the dietician.

I’m not so sanguine now it’s actually happened.

The scales have gone up two days in a row.

I’m trying not to–it’s only half a pound, and I know this could be water or hormones or eating a bit more salt.

Because I’m worried about my calories being too low, I’ve started eating back my exercise calories. Well, mostly. I forgot to eat my apple yesterday, but it’s better than nothing, right?

I’m so sore today that I almost can’t walk. I’m going to do some yoga tonight because I can’t do weights. I figure half an hour of yoga (more stretching than strenuous) will at least fit my criteria of doing at least half an hour’s exercise each day. Does anyone have any good recommendations? Youtube/free for now, but if you want to recommend DVDs for later, I’ll keep it in mind.

The emergence of bone

10.2 pounds lost this month, 4.2 lost in the past week.

My jeans are easier to get on over my thighs, but because I’ve lost a bit of fat around my belly they’re not staying up the best. Because I’m not stuffed into them like a sausage (although they’re still tight) I may need a belt until I lose a few centimeters off my thighs.

The thing is, looking in a mirror–I don’t see any difference. Maybe a SLIGHT reduction in my pot belly. But where I do notice a reduction is in the feel of my body.

I can distinctly feel bones in my fingers. I couldn’t before. My face is getting to be more square than round, and I can feel distinct lines of my jawbone and cheekbones. My collarbones are more distinct and where I could only vaguely have told you that yes, based on anatomical models I almost certainly had a sternum above my breasts, now I can feel it.

It’s hard not to get frustrated. I still have a pair of size 12 jeans in my wardrobe. I’m now a size 16-18. I’m glad I didn’t throw them out, because it’s been four years since I’ve been able to wear them. But I can see myself getting into them again–not now, but possibly by the end of the year.

Notes: I ran but didn’t lift weights last night because I started, then found I was too sore (I think I need to buy lighter dumbbells. On my list, along with another pair of tracksuit pants for exercise). But I’ll do legwork tonight and try to fit upper body in. But I’m really proud of myself for my run. The program I’m doing is Zombies Run 5K. I’m only in week 2, which was 30 second runs/5 heel lifts/a minute’s walk. Then at the end, they give you a 10 minute freeform run.

I started off walking for most of it. Then I managed a minute and a half of running. Then up to three, then four minutes.

Last night, I managed six minutes running, including a 2 minute run that went 30 seconds into cool-down time because I wanted to hit that 2 minutes. I’m improving. I can do this.

And so it goes

I have another appointment with another dietician this weekend. We’ll see how it goes.

I was thinking today about patterns. And how I actually think at the moment I’m in a healthy pattern. You see, I’ve always been bad at being “adult”. It was almost something I was proud of. I ate irregularly, some time between once a day and every two days. I ate huge meals. I ate cheese, which I love but am increasingly allergic to. I drank. A lot.

One of the things that was so hard about this time around is that I’m eating a LOT more. While before I would eat a baguette with roast beef and roquette and cheese for lunch, and then just drink or have leftover bread and cheese for dinner, and maybe just drink coffee the next day with whatever junkfood I scrounged for dinner, now I am eating three meals a day. I’m eating snacks.

Because I was sick yesterday, and also sick on Friday and on Saturday I had fasting bloods taken and so I couldn’t eat for half the day, I really noticed that my patterns were off. Saturday was really obvious–I couldn’t eat until I had my blood taken, so I got home and ate breakfast about 11:45am. Then I wasn’t hungry at lunch-time, a mere hour later, so I went out to do my weekly shopping. The shopping center was insane that week and there were a few special purchases I had to make so I was in there for quite a while.

When I got out at 4pm, I was shaking from low blood sugar. I bought things I didn’t really need because I was hungry. I consider it a major victory that I got out with only having bought smoked salmon and bread extra. (They were actually a really good choice, because I need more omega 3 fatty acids in my diet, and I swear, if I got home and had to make and eat a salad and wait for it to get my blood sugar up, I was going to cry.) Still, now I have most of a loaf of bread sitting on the counter. I may have to freeze it and have a slice or two on weekends.

Anyway, the point is: this diet gives me so much more energy, but it takes a couple of days to take effect. And because I ate all of the sugar yesterday, today is hard. I’m feeling lethargic and want to go for more sugar. It’s not too bad–I have my snacks and I know that tomorrow I’ll be feeling better and the day after I will be FULL of energy.

I just have to get there.